Girls Are Expensive: How to be a Girl Worth the Cost

girlsareexpensiveAll right already. I’d about heard enough. Girls cost much too much. Mitch and KP had made that perfectly clear. Girls take your wallet when they steal your heart. They need things from you like emotions and time and OMG texts back. They’re the type of high maintenance that has an on-call repairman, (aka: the boyfriend).

The more the boys ranted about dating expenses, the more I shriveled (and we’d been soaking in the hot tub for a time, so I was fairly pruned to begin with). I don’t know about you, dear person reading, but I’m not fond of being told I’m overpriced.

I prefer priceless.

Finally Mitch pulled himself onto the side, brushing off water. “All I’m saying is I’ve never walked away from a relationship like ‘oh yeah, I came out on top of that one.’” 0dddd8d4a2e85ed72874288c2f67bc54

I glanced at my cousin to see if she had any ideas for our line of defense.

Honestly though, a retreat was in our favor. I mean, Mitch and KP had both dated. They were gentlemen, paying.

When you put together Irena and my experience with men and carried the one, you still got zip. Plus, arguing your inexpensiveness when you are with your brother is just unfair. KP had a rebuttal for everything. Darn those debate classes.

Now that family vacation is over and I’ve returned to a campus of cuties, I’ve participated in some group dates. If girls ask, girls pay. (And can I just take the opportunity to say the males are expensive suckers too?) Having sprung for the bill on my last date, I’ve been reevaluating.

Exactly how much do I cost? And more importantly, how much am I worth?

Rather than answer for myself, I texted my brother.

Me: Am I high maintenance? He quickly texted back.

KP: Nope, you’re perfect 🙂 highmaintanence

Which further confirmed my fears I might indeed be a high maintenance girl.

Things were not looking up. Things were not looking pretty. Things were not looking like Thing #2 would be coming around with flowers anytime soon—at least, not with anything less than my favorites. Poppies.

Even though I had it on good authority from that “people are willing to pay for quality,” it didn’t provide any solution to how I could better myself into a girl who gave a boy his money’s worth. In a very un-prostitute kind of way.

I started by defining the problem or at least negativity attached to high maintenance. While Billy Crystal summarized high maintenance well in When Harry Met Sally, I was looking for something a little more concrete.

I present to you Dad’s concrete definition: “High maintenance to me means someone who is self-centered and demands much from others.” – Dad

Ask Men had a nice pros and con list which was basically a picture of High School Musical‘s Sharpay Evans in her search for fabulous. Since I am not a fashion or shoe lover and have a weird pet peeve with having my nails painted, by Ask Men’s examples, I am only little maintenance.

So, I clicked over to a high maintenance article from a woman’s perspective. Divine Caroline’s What Does “High Maintenance” Really Mean? spoke more to my high expectations.

highstandardsStill somewhat in denial, I sought out a quiz to solve my problem. First I took How High Maintenance Are You? But when Playbuzz didn’t give me the right answer, I turned to Oprah.

Oprah says I am a “Little High Maintenance.” Which, okay.

Finally, Jarrid Wilson’s 23 Qualities of a Woman Worth Dating popped up in my search. And I did pretty well on that list, if I do say so myself.

But myself is still expensive.

Whenever a date of mine pays, I make it worth his while by

1. Being respectful of his time and commitments

I’m always dressed and ready for the date on time. Besides, if I were late getting ready, it’s my loss because our time together is shorter.

2. Being grateful 

This is easy. Say thank you. Be appreciate. Nothing will show him this more than by enjoying yourself on the date he planned special for you.

3. And being fair

Remember there are two people on the date. Watch Gladiator instead of Sleepless In Seattle. Order pizza instead of Chinese. Let him teach you how to play a video game or his chosen sport. You might even get lucky, and he’ll do “the move.”

I have faith in you, dear person reading. You can do this. In fact, I have a feeling you’re already well on your way.

Your turn. What do you think makes a girl overpriced or priceless? I’m all ears.


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My name is Nichole—Nichole Parks. Not to be confused with Nicholas Sparks. Nicky boy handles the drama. And me? I take on the trauma. Dark humor is my specialty.

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